Gotta Go My Own Way
by flipxflops
Summary: Oneshot about Addison's decision to leave Seattle for LA. Includes lyrics.


Yes, the story is based on the song from HSM2 and includes lyrics. But it's not super cheesy, I promise.

"Hey Addison, it's Naomi. Just wanted to make sure you knew to call this number if you wanted to chat, or if you're interested in working in LA. I really want to keep in contact with you. Talk to you soon, bye."

She listened to that message on her voicemail over ten times. At first, she planned to call her back just to keep in touch. But now, the job in LA was constantly running through her mind. What was her purpose in Seattle? She hated the weather, felt like a complete outsider, had complicated relationships with three men who worked in the same hospital, and wasn't looking for a fourth. Sometimes it seemed like she was only staying in Seattle to punish herself.

_But I get my hopes up and watch them fall every time_

"Congratulations Dr. Montgomery," said the Chief.

"For what?" she asked, confused. What did I do that was so impressive?

"You saved a mother and son's life, didn't you?"

"Oh yeah," she remembered. "It was nothing."

"Don't be so modest, not many people can perform surgery in such intense conditions."

She should be happy, the Chief was right, not many people could have performed the surgery as successfully as she had less than an hour ago. In med school, she used to boost about her high grades. Derek always teased her for being so competitive, but she insisted it was all in good nature. When she started her internship, she loved being told about her bright future. And she used to love hearing about how she was at the top of her game. Unfortunately, the cliché about it being lonely at the top was right. Her career was better than she could have ever dreamed, but now she wasn't so sure if there was much in her life that deserved to be envied.

_I just don't belong here_

Seattle hated her. Of course it was pouring rain the one day she forgot to bring an umbrella or anything that could protect her hair. She tried running to her car, but no matter how gorgeous her high heel shoes were, they were clearly not designed to win a marathon.

When she entered her hotel room she was anxious to take a long shower. But a shower would only make her clean for the next day and that just wasn't good enough for her tonight. So she made a phone call. "Naomi? It's Addison."

_I've got to move on and be who I am_

"Just answer me, why?" persisted Mark.

"I don't even know the answer to that question," she responded. "But Seattle just isn't right for me. I can do better."

"Is it about me?" asked Mark. "You shouldn't run to a different state because of me."

"It's not all about you," answered Addison. "And if I recall correctly, you were planning on leaving Seattle at one point to because you hated it. I hate it too. I'm just going through with my decision."

"True, but I was going back to New York where I knew what I was doing. You've visited LA, but do you really know enough about it to live there? I think you're rushing into things."

"Well thanks Dr. Phil, but I think I'm old enough to make these kinds of decisions for myself."

_But at least for now, I've __gotta__ go my own way_

She had so many clothes, and shoes, lots and lots of shoes. She couldn't bear to part with any of her shoes, but she could do without some of the cooler weather clothes.

Hours passed as she sorted through everything into three piles. 'Definitely bring', 'Definitely don't bring' and 'Bring if there's room'. The 'Definitely bring' pile was a fair size, the 'Bring if there's room' pile was so large it was intimidating, and the 'Definitely don't bring' pile was pathetically tiny.

"Okay, I can buy new clothes in LA," said Addison. "I just have to bring the things I know I'll get use out of." Buying clothes was not a problem for Addison. She was always the kid who wanted everything, and as an only child her parents couldn't say no. The year her parents gave her money to shop for her own Christmas gifts she didn't waste a penny of it. If she couldn't decide which color shirt looked best on her, she bought both. But choosing what to rid of, that was a completely different story.

"I'm donating the clothes I don't want to charity. I'm donating the clothes I don't want to charity," she kept telling herself.

The decisions of what clothes to bring and which ones to leave behind ended up as more of a coin toss, but in the end, everything was packed.

As she doubled checked everything, Addison found something interesting at the very bottom of one of her drawers. She pulled out two items of clothing, a red bikini top with a matching bottom. She couldn't even remember the last time she wore it, certainly not Seattle. Might as well make sure it still fits. After she had changed into the red outfit she realized just how tiny it was on her body. LA was going to be very fun.

_I'm leaving today '__cause__ I __gotta__ do what's best for me_


End file.
